Joeli's Birthday Run

  Lately my thoughts and actions have been racing in every direction but "productive" and blogging has somehow found it's place smack in the middle of the chaos.  For those who know me personally you have heard about Joeli's birthday run but for those who keep up with us via the blog this is probably the first you've heard about it.  I am honored to be a part of The Ella Jewell Foundation www.ellajewellfoudation.com and blessed to call Ella's sweet mama "friend".  The Ella Jewell Foundation raises awareness for Neutropenia and also raises money for the SCNIR (the registry that researches and provides our medication). 
   This year I was presented with the opportunity to be a part of a 5K hosted in New York inside Yankee stadium.  What's even more mind blowing to me is that they wanted to honor my sweet Joeli for this race!  Wanna know how cool God is?!  It wasn't planned this way but it happens to fall on her 10th birthday!!  August 18, 2013 my sweet girl would be 10 years old and I'll be running for her along side many other supporters of cancer research.  I am borderline speechless!  (keep in mind I did say borderline so this post isn't over) haha. 
    I have mixed emotions about this year.  This will be the first year that I am away from my family on one of the most important days of my life.  The day that sweet girl was placed into my arms for the very first time will forever be one of the best days of my life.  I struggle with my own sadness on that day but not because the day is sad...because I miss her.  I miss what should have been.  This year will be very different.  I won't have Chad, Brelan and Mileigh by my side.  I will have a team of new friends by my side who care about and love a child they never met and that my friends, is an honor. 
    We tend to keep Joeli's birthday celebrations private and just within our own little family on that particular day.  We get a small cake, complete with candles.  We visit her marker and release balloons.  We add a balloon for each year.  This year I will release balloons in New York.  Part of me is excited about bringing my Joeli to a new part of the U.S., another part is sad that I won't be standing near her resting place at that time. I will definitely celebrate with Chad, Brelan, and Mileigh once I'm home so Joeli will get double the balloons this year...I smile when I think of what her potential reaction would be to the double celebration.  This reminds me of a recurring dream I often have of her.  Her smile, her laugh, her eyes that her soul shines through, and all that is Joeli reminds me to smile even when it hurts.  As parents we tend to dream FOR our children, help them set high goals and reach them, push them to be whatever they want to be...the difference for me and Joeli is I dream to see her.
    Each new day that we are blessed to inhale and wake our sleeping children is a gift...I'm required to meet Joeli in my dreams for now. 
    Take a minute and look into the link I listed in the beginning of this post, pray for the runners, pray for the families affected by different forms of Neutropenia, pray for the physicians who care for us, pray about maybe what YOU can do.  Encourage with your words even if it's just to share what's been shared with you.  Consider a financial donation...none is too small and each cent matters. 
    I'm going to be quite blunt at this point.  I NEED your prayers.  I need to run this race for my girl.  I need for this breaking heart to be still.  I need to be strong at a time when being strong is nowhere in sight.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart!  I am blessed by you!  I am blessed by your support and your comments of encouragement.  Thank you for reading and sharing and for loving a child many of you never got to meet.  She was truly one of a kind!  Here is a direct link to support Joeli's Birthday Run (http://longrace4tate.com/joelis-birthday-run/)    Be Blessed!